I had a massage today (hence the lack of steps) but I still couldn't cut off my brain.
Thinking about what I gave up.
Thinking about the chance of failure.
Thinking about the struggle.
Thinking about everything I should be doing instead of relaxing.
It's only been 19 days but in ways it feels like months. This may have to do with the fact that I have thismuch patience.
But as difficult as this feels, I must remember, it's not as bad as this:
Your life depends on it. MY life depends on it.
Tomorrow is the last day of sweeps*. The end of a month's worth of nearly debilitating stress. Stress I've been enduring three times a year for almost two decades.
Those months DO completely zoom by. And all I have to show for it is puffiness.
In case you didn't know:
Stress + coffee + alcohol - sleep = puffiness.
And for what? We weren't changing the world. Not even a little bit. In fact, according to most people I know, "the media" is a part of the problem. But let's not dwell on that. That is no longer my problem.
This is what I should be focusing on:
* The term "sweeps" dates from 1954, when Nielsen collected diaries from households in the Eastern United States first; from there they would "sweep" west. This local viewing information provides a basis for program scheduling and advertising decisions for local television stations, cable systems, and advertisers. Typically, the November, February and May sweeps are considered more important. - Source: Wikipedia.